So, I’ve arrived at a new chapter in my so-far nonexistent writing career. I realized I don’t do the one thing I should above all else—write. Funny, isn’t it? After reading Michaelbrent Collings’s article on writer’s block, it was so obvious. I talk about writing, think about it, listen to podcasts, go to symposiums and conferences, but I don’t actually write. At least, not consistently. I write once in a while, and then moan the rest of the time about how I’m supposed to be writing.
So here’s my new writing schedule: wake up at 5 a.m. Write for 40 minutes. 5:45 a.m.—get ready for school. Voila! My writing is done for the day first thing in the morning before I could get distracted in any way by TV, phone calls, or other people in the house (no one else is awake at 5 a.m.). I tried it out last week and it was extremely effective. Of course, it was also Spring Break and I was able to write longer than 40 minutes. We’ll see how it goes this week with school back on.
It’s just…I got so sick of missing the ONE short window of time in the evenings that I could have used to write in the middle of recovering from a long day of school, talking to people, catching snatches of what they were watching on TV, surfing the net, going to institutue, going to karate practice, Relief Society meetings…etc. I thought to myself, “FINE! That’s it! It’s Spring Break and I STILL can’t write. Fine. I’ll get up at 5 a.m. and do it first thing in the morning before anything else can interrupt me.” So I did. And it worked. In fact, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Of course it’d be better to do it in the morning. My evenings are so crazy and I get distracted so easily, why not avoid the issue altogether and just do it in the morning?
But that means I have to go to bed at 10 p.m. every night—difficult task.
It was great, though, writing every morning and finally feeling like a real writer. I loved it.
Quote from Michaelbrent’s article:
“Writing is NOT brain surgery. It is NOT nuclear weapons testing. It is WRITING. It is something that anyone and everyone can do. And along with that fact, it is also something that anyone and everyone WILL get good at. If they practice. If they recognize “writer’s block” for what it really is: their own insecurity getting in the way of a good first draft.”
Looking forward to:
Season 6 of Doctor Who (premiered last week)
Season 4 of Merlin (premieres this fall)
Next Percy Jackson book (released this fall)
Avatar: The Legend of Korra (premieres this fall)
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
How to be Happy Part I
“In contrast to sin, which is ugly and costly, obedience is brilliant and it’s fruit endless. One of those fruits is happiness—the only way to be happy is to live the gospel.
It is not possible to sin enough to be happy. It isn’t possible to buy enough to be happy, or to entertain or indulge or pamper ourselves enough to be happy. It is not possible to hide enough or run far enough away from trials and toubles to be happy. Happiness and joy come only when we are living up to who we are [--children of God].
…I have never met anyone who was happier because he was immoral, or because he was addicted to something, or because he was dishonest and compromised his integrity.
This “less traveled road” is actually the easier road. It is so much easier to be righteous than to sin, so much easier to deal with a clean conscience than one ravaged by guilt so much easier to feel peace of mind and heart when we are living up to who we are rather than coping with the emotional and spiritual ravages of regret, knowing we have lived beneath our divine nature.”
–Sheri Dew, God Wants a Powerful People pg 53-54
It is not possible to sin enough to be happy. It isn’t possible to buy enough to be happy, or to entertain or indulge or pamper ourselves enough to be happy. It is not possible to hide enough or run far enough away from trials and toubles to be happy. Happiness and joy come only when we are living up to who we are [--children of God].
…I have never met anyone who was happier because he was immoral, or because he was addicted to something, or because he was dishonest and compromised his integrity.
This “less traveled road” is actually the easier road. It is so much easier to be righteous than to sin, so much easier to deal with a clean conscience than one ravaged by guilt so much easier to feel peace of mind and heart when we are living up to who we are rather than coping with the emotional and spiritual ravages of regret, knowing we have lived beneath our divine nature.”
–Sheri Dew, God Wants a Powerful People pg 53-54
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Can't Stand Still
It is my firm belief that as soon as you feel like your life is getting comfortable, or that you’re finally getting used to the hundreds of responsibilities that you have, God will shake it up every time. If we are truly following his commandments, he will not leave us in our comfort zones like stagnant water to be scummed over with slime. Nope. As soon as you think your life might be okay for a little while, God slaps you with something else to keep you on your toes. Or maybe it’s because after you’ve proved you can handle what you’ve been given, God decides that you are ready for more. So, cool that God trusts you so much, but annoying that your life gets even more crazy. I love that quote from Mother Theresa: “I know that God will never give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”
Case in point—The past two weeks have been me worrying to death about finishing my Shakespeare paper (which I get to present at BYU in three weeks—YAHOO!), searching and applying for scholarships while getting ready to receive my endowments in the temple. I had to go back to the distribution center TWICE for the right sizes.
I finally finished the major revisions of my Shakespeare paper and hoped that I could breathe easy for a week. But no. I’m teaching a lesson in Relief Society the day after leading the music for my cousin’s baptism. Then Brother Jackson pulls me aside and says I should give a sacrament meeting talk because I’ve just been to the temple. So. This week—baptism and relief society lesson. Next week—sacrament meeting talk. The week after that—present my Shakespeare paper at BYU and attend the three day symposium (so excited!).
Sheesh. God will NOT let me sit still. But, having a busy life is a blessing. No chances to be bored, and all the things I’m doing are shaping my life into what I want it to be. It’s all for my own good. Who wouldn’t want more goodness in their lives? I’m so excited for my presentation. I feel more and more like a real writer these days. My dreams are coming true!
Case in point—The past two weeks have been me worrying to death about finishing my Shakespeare paper (which I get to present at BYU in three weeks—YAHOO!), searching and applying for scholarships while getting ready to receive my endowments in the temple. I had to go back to the distribution center TWICE for the right sizes.
I finally finished the major revisions of my Shakespeare paper and hoped that I could breathe easy for a week. But no. I’m teaching a lesson in Relief Society the day after leading the music for my cousin’s baptism. Then Brother Jackson pulls me aside and says I should give a sacrament meeting talk because I’ve just been to the temple. So. This week—baptism and relief society lesson. Next week—sacrament meeting talk. The week after that—present my Shakespeare paper at BYU and attend the three day symposium (so excited!).
Sheesh. God will NOT let me sit still. But, having a busy life is a blessing. No chances to be bored, and all the things I’m doing are shaping my life into what I want it to be. It’s all for my own good. Who wouldn’t want more goodness in their lives? I’m so excited for my presentation. I feel more and more like a real writer these days. My dreams are coming true!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Day by Day--Handling Stress
The BEST part of the past two weeks was me figuring out that I can’t stay at school til 5:00 anymore. My neighbor is always concerned about my stress levels (I cried on Christmas Day—how lame is that?) and told me to look up Dr. Lam’s article on Adrenal Fatigue. I’m not going to follow Dr. Lam’s strict program for Adrenal Recovery, but reading his article made me realize that I wasn’t giving myself enough time to rejuvenate each day. By going to bed late, I robbed my body of the time usually spent rejuvenating the adrenal glands. The adrenal glands are what the body uses to handle stress. I knew I couldn’t just eliminate all the activities in my life. Instead, I had to ensure that my body was able to handle the stress of teaching school from day to day. By going to bed at eleven, my body didn’t have enough rest to recover and be replenished for the next day. So the next morning, I’d already be running on borrowed energy. That night, I’d go to bed late again, trying to keep up with writing, recreation, and family duties, thus depleting my energy reserves even further, day after day, until my body literally couldn’t handle the stress any more.
This week, I’ve committed to go to bed by 10:30 every night so that my body gets enough sleep to replenish the energy I need for the next day. In addition, I’ve committed to leave school by 4:00 every afternoon to make sure that my brain has enough time to recover from school, emails, and angry parents before I have to attend institute, FHE, or karate practice. School is great, but I need time to unwind and regroup before I’m ready to socialize at institute.
Basically, I’ve committed to give my body the sleep and time it needs to replenish itself every day instead of waiting for Summer vacation to feel happy again. If I don’t clean off my desk, I can do it the next morning when I’m feeling refreshed and energetic. I’ll have more energy and thus, I’ll be more efficient and get more done. It’s worked! I’m loving it so far. It’s okay for me to have a terrible, stressful day at school. I just need to have time to rest and recover. Leaving school at 4:00 is now a NECESSITY, not a luxury.
I never knew that bedtime, day after day, was so important! My neighbor was very concerned, knowing that I needed to figure out how to handle all the stress in my life before diving into an accelerated, one year film school program. How would I survive? The Advanced Immersion program goes for 11 months straight. NO summer vacation. I can’t wait for the weekend anymore to feel “okay” again. I don’t want to wait for summer vacation or Christmas break or the next term to feel happy. I want to be happy every day, every hour. I have a RIGHT to be happy every day and wake up in the morning with a cheerful heart. Although I can’t escape the stress of everyday life, if I give myself time to rest every day, than it won’t matter anymore. My problem wasn’t the fact that I had to do Mom’s tax abatement and write and handle lesson planning, along with writing projects and singles ward activities, the problem was that I was running myself to the ground, never stopping, night after night. If I rest as I go, I’ll have enough energy to handle it all. If I rest, I can greet the next day with a cheerful heart and be prepared for whatever the next day might bring. Wow.
My life has grown. More activities, more responsibilities, more requirements. I way I handle all those things has to change, too. Day by day, work and rest, sorrow and joy—that’s the secret. Just like Elder Anderson said in his CES fireside talk. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. That’s the secret.
This week, I’ve committed to go to bed by 10:30 every night so that my body gets enough sleep to replenish the energy I need for the next day. In addition, I’ve committed to leave school by 4:00 every afternoon to make sure that my brain has enough time to recover from school, emails, and angry parents before I have to attend institute, FHE, or karate practice. School is great, but I need time to unwind and regroup before I’m ready to socialize at institute.
Basically, I’ve committed to give my body the sleep and time it needs to replenish itself every day instead of waiting for Summer vacation to feel happy again. If I don’t clean off my desk, I can do it the next morning when I’m feeling refreshed and energetic. I’ll have more energy and thus, I’ll be more efficient and get more done. It’s worked! I’m loving it so far. It’s okay for me to have a terrible, stressful day at school. I just need to have time to rest and recover. Leaving school at 4:00 is now a NECESSITY, not a luxury.
I never knew that bedtime, day after day, was so important! My neighbor was very concerned, knowing that I needed to figure out how to handle all the stress in my life before diving into an accelerated, one year film school program. How would I survive? The Advanced Immersion program goes for 11 months straight. NO summer vacation. I can’t wait for the weekend anymore to feel “okay” again. I don’t want to wait for summer vacation or Christmas break or the next term to feel happy. I want to be happy every day, every hour. I have a RIGHT to be happy every day and wake up in the morning with a cheerful heart. Although I can’t escape the stress of everyday life, if I give myself time to rest every day, than it won’t matter anymore. My problem wasn’t the fact that I had to do Mom’s tax abatement and write and handle lesson planning, along with writing projects and singles ward activities, the problem was that I was running myself to the ground, never stopping, night after night. If I rest as I go, I’ll have enough energy to handle it all. If I rest, I can greet the next day with a cheerful heart and be prepared for whatever the next day might bring. Wow.
My life has grown. More activities, more responsibilities, more requirements. I way I handle all those things has to change, too. Day by day, work and rest, sorrow and joy—that’s the secret. Just like Elder Anderson said in his CES fireside talk. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. That’s the secret.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Kid Stuff
Okay, I’m writing this post now because I’ve got writer’s block with my novel. So here goes: A few months ago my grandpa gave me a bag full of papers. The papers that Grandma had kept for years-- report cards, pictures I drew at school, mother’s day poems . . . etc. I sat at the kitchen table with my sister Lori and started looking through them. I picked up the autobiography that I wrote in fifth grade.
I’ve forgotten how long the biography was supposed to be, or how many pages the other students wrote—but I had NINE. NINE pages full of details about my ten year old life.
I started reading it out loud to my sister, Lori. I couldn’t believe how good it was! After teaching seventh graders for two years, I’ve found that only a few students write consistently in complete sentences. Only a few connect their sentences in a way that helps them flow together. Only a few actually have a sense for what writing should sound like. And here I was, reading a fifth grade autobiography that would have sounded beautiful coming from a seventh grader! I was shocked. I wrote in complete sentences. I even used all of my apostrophes correctly. Every sentence had a period. Every word was spelled correctly. I even used specific details and started my sentences in different ways. Holy COW, I was a wonderful writer as early as fifth grade! I had no clue that I was that good. No wonder my ninth grade English teacher yelled at me for not signing up for the honors English class. Wow.
I thought writing was something I had developed more as a teenager and in college. But this old elementary assignment showed me that writing was a talent I’d had forever. It’s something that has always been with me.
I wonder if my writing talent was something I had in the preexistence. How much of my personality comes from my spiritual identity? I don’t think these kinds of things pop out of nowhere.
I’ve forgotten how long the biography was supposed to be, or how many pages the other students wrote—but I had NINE. NINE pages full of details about my ten year old life.
I started reading it out loud to my sister, Lori. I couldn’t believe how good it was! After teaching seventh graders for two years, I’ve found that only a few students write consistently in complete sentences. Only a few connect their sentences in a way that helps them flow together. Only a few actually have a sense for what writing should sound like. And here I was, reading a fifth grade autobiography that would have sounded beautiful coming from a seventh grader! I was shocked. I wrote in complete sentences. I even used all of my apostrophes correctly. Every sentence had a period. Every word was spelled correctly. I even used specific details and started my sentences in different ways. Holy COW, I was a wonderful writer as early as fifth grade! I had no clue that I was that good. No wonder my ninth grade English teacher yelled at me for not signing up for the honors English class. Wow.
I thought writing was something I had developed more as a teenager and in college. But this old elementary assignment showed me that writing was a talent I’d had forever. It’s something that has always been with me.
I wonder if my writing talent was something I had in the preexistence. How much of my personality comes from my spiritual identity? I don’t think these kinds of things pop out of nowhere.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
The Simple Life
Simplifying My Life
October 7, 2010 at 4:47 am (Uncategorized)
Wow. I survived the last two weeks. After staying home all weekend and experiencing the spiritual feast of the (LDS) General Conference, I actually woke up happy! I was excited to go to school! It’s been great.
I went to Karate practice on Monday and it was intense. Lots of drills, lots of sweat, and we finished up with sparring sessions. I can usually get through all the other stuff without falling over, but the intense effort required for sparring leaves me huffing and puffing like a blowfish. For a person who only exercises about twice a week, sparring is HARD. And lucky me, I got to do four sessions in a row and the last session was with my instructor. Even before we started I knew I was in trouble. I realized I had to conserve my strength. So instead of tensing up and worrying about every little punch and kick, I made a conscious decision to stay relaxed so I could save enough energy for the last sparring session.
Surprisingly, I made it. I didn’t fall over and I wasn’t huffing and puffing like a blowfish. I even landed a sweet punch on my instructor’s face (he was ecstatic). Afterwards, I realized that was what Elder Uchtdorf was talking about in General Conference on Saturday. When you hit turbulence in your life, don’t tense up and stress out, relax. Take it slow, conserve your energy and get through it one step at a time. It makes so much sense—don’t worry, don’t freak out, and you’ll make it through. I like that a lot better than trying to increase my pace, to add more items to my to-do list and pile more responsibilities on top of myself.
For me it also means choosing not to worry about all the little incidents in my life. If my first class went badly—it’s okay. I’ll fix it before the next class. If I didn’t finish all the grading in one day, it’s okay, I can work on it tomorrow. As long as I am doing what I am supposed to (fulfilling my duties, taking care of my family, and serving God) I don’t need to waste energy worrying about everything. As long as I am sincerely and actively following God, it will be OKAY.
Life feels a lot better when I think about it in that way.
October 7, 2010 at 4:47 am (Uncategorized)
Wow. I survived the last two weeks. After staying home all weekend and experiencing the spiritual feast of the (LDS) General Conference, I actually woke up happy! I was excited to go to school! It’s been great.
I went to Karate practice on Monday and it was intense. Lots of drills, lots of sweat, and we finished up with sparring sessions. I can usually get through all the other stuff without falling over, but the intense effort required for sparring leaves me huffing and puffing like a blowfish. For a person who only exercises about twice a week, sparring is HARD. And lucky me, I got to do four sessions in a row and the last session was with my instructor. Even before we started I knew I was in trouble. I realized I had to conserve my strength. So instead of tensing up and worrying about every little punch and kick, I made a conscious decision to stay relaxed so I could save enough energy for the last sparring session.
Surprisingly, I made it. I didn’t fall over and I wasn’t huffing and puffing like a blowfish. I even landed a sweet punch on my instructor’s face (he was ecstatic). Afterwards, I realized that was what Elder Uchtdorf was talking about in General Conference on Saturday. When you hit turbulence in your life, don’t tense up and stress out, relax. Take it slow, conserve your energy and get through it one step at a time. It makes so much sense—don’t worry, don’t freak out, and you’ll make it through. I like that a lot better than trying to increase my pace, to add more items to my to-do list and pile more responsibilities on top of myself.
For me it also means choosing not to worry about all the little incidents in my life. If my first class went badly—it’s okay. I’ll fix it before the next class. If I didn’t finish all the grading in one day, it’s okay, I can work on it tomorrow. As long as I am doing what I am supposed to (fulfilling my duties, taking care of my family, and serving God) I don’t need to waste energy worrying about everything. As long as I am sincerely and actively following God, it will be OKAY.
Life feels a lot better when I think about it in that way.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Every Journey Begins...
Holy cow, it’s been a long time! Time for me to repent. Here’s your next serving of philosophical goodness:
Life before death.
Strength before Weakness.
Journey before destination.
These are the words quoted in Brandon Sanderson’s new epic fantasy The Way of Kings. A monster book that is over 1,000 pages long, it holds surprising wisdom in its pages. At one point in the book, one of the main characters is studying the ancient tome named The Way of Kings, which illustrates the strict Codes of conduct required of righteous kings.
The author tells a story about when he decided to leave behind his retinue and escort and travel to a distant city by foot. Although a powerful king, he travels in the clothes of a beggar, depending on others for help and sustenance. He walks barefoot over rocks and hills, finally arriving at his destination weeks later. At first, no one recognizes him at the city gates, but when they realize his true identity, he is whisked away to be bathed, examined, and scolded for his foolish journey. The others in the king’s traveling party arrived quickly and easily, while the king’s feet were covered with calluses. Although they all arrived in the same place, the others remained unchanged by their journey. They were exactly the same as before. Just as arrogant, just as ignorant to a poor way of life. In contrast, the king saw many things on his way, developed strength and saw his people as they truly lived instead of through the veil of bowing, praise, and obedience.
The king considered his journey, and realized that the destination itself had no effect on the people who traveled there. It was the JOURNEY that made the difference. What mattered was how they went, not where they were going. It was the journey that changed the man, not the arrival.
When this story is compared with life and its journey to death, it made so much sense. Everyone is headed for the same fate—death. Every man on this earth will die, whether young, old, rich, or poor. The fate is the same for all. But it is how we live, our journey, that makes the difference. Will we live following the world and taking the easy path? Or will we struggle for what is right and stand strong for what we believe? It is the journey that counts. The journey that changes us into better men. If two people are headed to work, perhaps one man is in a hurry and curses every car who gets in his way. When he arrives at work he is irritable and does nothing but spread negativity. But maybe the other man, who left at the same time, is polite on the road, exercises patience, and decides to think of pleasant things as he waits in the heavy traffic. He arrives at work relieved but cheerful. He spreads his positive attitude and makes his workplace brighter. Same destination. Completely different results.
This story helped me realize that the day to day routines are more important than I thought. What does it matter if I die tomorrow? As long as I have been diligent in my duties, obeyed the commandments day after day after day, I have nothing to fear and nothing to regret. My journey will have made me a better person and I will be able to rejoice in my triumph. This story tells me why the little things are important.
Life before death.
Strength before Weakness.
Journey before destination.
These are the words quoted in Brandon Sanderson’s new epic fantasy The Way of Kings. A monster book that is over 1,000 pages long, it holds surprising wisdom in its pages. At one point in the book, one of the main characters is studying the ancient tome named The Way of Kings, which illustrates the strict Codes of conduct required of righteous kings.
The author tells a story about when he decided to leave behind his retinue and escort and travel to a distant city by foot. Although a powerful king, he travels in the clothes of a beggar, depending on others for help and sustenance. He walks barefoot over rocks and hills, finally arriving at his destination weeks later. At first, no one recognizes him at the city gates, but when they realize his true identity, he is whisked away to be bathed, examined, and scolded for his foolish journey. The others in the king’s traveling party arrived quickly and easily, while the king’s feet were covered with calluses. Although they all arrived in the same place, the others remained unchanged by their journey. They were exactly the same as before. Just as arrogant, just as ignorant to a poor way of life. In contrast, the king saw many things on his way, developed strength and saw his people as they truly lived instead of through the veil of bowing, praise, and obedience.
The king considered his journey, and realized that the destination itself had no effect on the people who traveled there. It was the JOURNEY that made the difference. What mattered was how they went, not where they were going. It was the journey that changed the man, not the arrival.
When this story is compared with life and its journey to death, it made so much sense. Everyone is headed for the same fate—death. Every man on this earth will die, whether young, old, rich, or poor. The fate is the same for all. But it is how we live, our journey, that makes the difference. Will we live following the world and taking the easy path? Or will we struggle for what is right and stand strong for what we believe? It is the journey that counts. The journey that changes us into better men. If two people are headed to work, perhaps one man is in a hurry and curses every car who gets in his way. When he arrives at work he is irritable and does nothing but spread negativity. But maybe the other man, who left at the same time, is polite on the road, exercises patience, and decides to think of pleasant things as he waits in the heavy traffic. He arrives at work relieved but cheerful. He spreads his positive attitude and makes his workplace brighter. Same destination. Completely different results.
This story helped me realize that the day to day routines are more important than I thought. What does it matter if I die tomorrow? As long as I have been diligent in my duties, obeyed the commandments day after day after day, I have nothing to fear and nothing to regret. My journey will have made me a better person and I will be able to rejoice in my triumph. This story tells me why the little things are important.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Week of "__LL"
This past week has been the worst week of my entire life. Bar none. (Exaggeration in this blog post is intentional.) Last weekend, I had a great time going around the State Fair with my family from 12:00 to 9:00. But little did I know, that I had managed to catch the flu and walking around for nine hours straight was NOT good for my health that day. So I missed church and skipped a day of school. But I wasn’t deathbed sick, I just didn’t have enough energy to teach. So I figured that Monday was a good day to finish writing the big walkaway test for first term. (I volunteered to do first term. Yes, I am an idiot. Any other questions?)
Well, I saw problems in the test items right away, mainly because our department had added extra items to the core and I knew we wouldn’t have enough time to teach it all. So I emailed some suggestions to the department head and he basically said, NO to everything. I felt like I’d hit a brick wall. So I spent that entire day trying to get a better understanding of the core, emailing suggestions to my department head, and talking to other teachers and experts to figure out what should really be on that stupid test. So, one full day and I wrote maybe three test questions.
So, day two of the week I don’t feel sick enough to stay home, and wonder of wonders—it’s parent teacher conference! I’m exhausted after a day of teaching on low energy levels, I’m eagerly anticipating the 45 minute break I get before the parents show up, and what do you know, a parent ambushes me in the hall and I have to get a flu shot in the office. I show up a half hour late in the cafeteria and have a steady stream of concerned, worried parents right up until 7:45. Three hours and forty-five minutes. Teaching is draining, but I think talking with parents is almost more so.
The next morning at school, I feel worse than I did the day before. In addition, that stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test is still hanging over my head like an anvil. I also figured out that morning that I have no idea what my students are doing for the rest of the week and realize that I should be hitting the persuasive writing unit and I have no idea how to organize it this year.
So, I manage to squeak by with a few impromptu lessons, and thank the stars my department head doesn’t say anything to me about the stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test. I think I actually taught some good concepts, but Friday was a gift from heaven and I finally got to go to the temple and get my spiritual buckets refilled.
Holy cow, what a week of torture. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I’d actually had energy and if that stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test wasn’t hovering over my tired, battered, fuzzed with flu head.
I’m so glad that week is over. I think I’ll be able to finish the walkaway test next week, I should have better energy, and hopefully I’ll have some time to plan out my persuasive writing unit before the district-wide writing test hits. My grandma said that you can survive anything for a week. I just proved her right. And without the spiritual strength of the temple, I’d probably be a shriveled up piece of jerky by now.
Well, I saw problems in the test items right away, mainly because our department had added extra items to the core and I knew we wouldn’t have enough time to teach it all. So I emailed some suggestions to the department head and he basically said, NO to everything. I felt like I’d hit a brick wall. So I spent that entire day trying to get a better understanding of the core, emailing suggestions to my department head, and talking to other teachers and experts to figure out what should really be on that stupid test. So, one full day and I wrote maybe three test questions.
So, day two of the week I don’t feel sick enough to stay home, and wonder of wonders—it’s parent teacher conference! I’m exhausted after a day of teaching on low energy levels, I’m eagerly anticipating the 45 minute break I get before the parents show up, and what do you know, a parent ambushes me in the hall and I have to get a flu shot in the office. I show up a half hour late in the cafeteria and have a steady stream of concerned, worried parents right up until 7:45. Three hours and forty-five minutes. Teaching is draining, but I think talking with parents is almost more so.
The next morning at school, I feel worse than I did the day before. In addition, that stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test is still hanging over my head like an anvil. I also figured out that morning that I have no idea what my students are doing for the rest of the week and realize that I should be hitting the persuasive writing unit and I have no idea how to organize it this year.
So, I manage to squeak by with a few impromptu lessons, and thank the stars my department head doesn’t say anything to me about the stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test. I think I actually taught some good concepts, but Friday was a gift from heaven and I finally got to go to the temple and get my spiritual buckets refilled.
Holy cow, what a week of torture. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I’d actually had energy and if that stupid, frustrating, demon-spawned walkaway test wasn’t hovering over my tired, battered, fuzzed with flu head.
I’m so glad that week is over. I think I’ll be able to finish the walkaway test next week, I should have better energy, and hopefully I’ll have some time to plan out my persuasive writing unit before the district-wide writing test hits. My grandma said that you can survive anything for a week. I just proved her right. And without the spiritual strength of the temple, I’d probably be a shriveled up piece of jerky by now.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Fancy Schmancy Quotes About Time
Personally, I love quotes. Quotes hold so much meaning in so few words. Last year I was searching for a cool quote to put on a giant clock. I wasn't too excited about the "love at home" and "Families are Forever" sayings (maybe because I'm single). I wanted something different and something that meant more to me. I came up with these two:
Time discovers truth.
-Seneca
Life, if lived well, is long enough.
-Seneca
Seneca, a Roman philosopher, had quotes that really touched me and contained mountains of truth in his sayings. If you live your life well, it doesn't matter how long or short it is. In the process of time, all truths will be revealed. We just have to be patient.
I found a lot more quotes about time and life that I liked on the internet. Here's the list of quotes that didn't make the cut:
We say we waste time, but that is impossible. We waste ourselves.”
-Alice Bloch
You may delay, but time will not.
-Benjamin Franklin
| To achieve great things, two things are needed; a plan, and not quite enough time.” |
| Leonard Bernstein quotes (American Conductor, Composer and Pianist. 1918-1990 |
Jef Raskin, interviewed in Doctor Dobb's Journal
Bill Watterson (1958 - ), cartoonist, "Calvin and Hobbes"
|
|
The time is always right to do what is right.”
--Martin Luther King Jr.
Time heals what reason cannot.
--Seneca
“The heart is great which shows moderation in the midst of prosperity.”
--Seneca
“He is most powerful who has power over himself”
--Seneca
Many things have fallen only to rise higher.
Seneca
No one can wear a mask for very long.
Seneca
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed
Will Rogers (1879 - 1935), New York TImes, Apr. 29, 1930
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes. 
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Arguing with the World
Lately, I’ve been thinking that it would be really cool to go to film school. I love movies, and would love to create them. But I worry that when in a film class, I will be subjected to material that I would never watch by choice. Material that is far below my standards and that will destroy my efforts to stay clean. I’ve wondered how I would explain my position to my professors, what words I would use to beg them to let me watch something else. This is an imagined conversation with a professor who can’t understand why I don’t want to watch a movie with sex scenes or that has demeaning sexual innuendo:
Sir, in my religion we are taught that physical intimacy between husband and wife is incredibly sacred. It is God’s way of gifting us with his own power of creation. Think of it! We believe that God created the heavens and the earth and he has given us that same power in our children. The power to give life, and to raise his sons and daughters as righteous members of his kingdom.
Because creation is such a powerful gift, God has commanded that we use it responsibly and with great care. In my religion, we are taught that physical intimacy must only happen between two people bonded as husband and wife. We are to practice complete abstinence before marriage, and complete fidelity afterwards.
If the power to give life is misused, it will have terrible consequences and is a mockery of God’s gift.
Sir, considering all these things I have been taught, how can I go and watch a sitcom where sex is treated like a cheap rag, something to be thrown around to satisfy desires, simply a way to get what you want. It astonishes me how sex is now as cheap as a penny, almost worthless. How can I treat physical intimacy as a sacred thing when the whole world screams at me to use it for personal gain and self indulgence?
No. I will not stand for this. I am a child of God, with a divine destiny and a divine heritage. God has seen fit to give me the gift of life and the gift of a physical body. I am precious in his sight, and I will treat myself as such. My body is not something to be thrown around to satisfy vile pleasures. I am more than that, a precious daughter who has a right to the full blessings of heaven if I but follow God’s commandments. I respect his will and his love by promising to use his gifts correctly.
So you tell me—how can I possibly watch something so demeaning to my divine identity? Something that tells me I am worth no more than my carnal pleasures, that I am nothing more than an animal. How can I watch Television shows that constantly tell me that bodies are cheap, that my life is nothing more than a quest to satisfy my sensual desires?
I say NO. I am more than that. I am of noble birth, and I refuse to fill my head with such despicable lies. I promise to watch worthy, uplifting entertainment that reminds me who I am, that encourages me to be good, that tells me I am worth something.
No sir, I will not watch such things.
Sir, in my religion we are taught that physical intimacy between husband and wife is incredibly sacred. It is God’s way of gifting us with his own power of creation. Think of it! We believe that God created the heavens and the earth and he has given us that same power in our children. The power to give life, and to raise his sons and daughters as righteous members of his kingdom.
Because creation is such a powerful gift, God has commanded that we use it responsibly and with great care. In my religion, we are taught that physical intimacy must only happen between two people bonded as husband and wife. We are to practice complete abstinence before marriage, and complete fidelity afterwards.
If the power to give life is misused, it will have terrible consequences and is a mockery of God’s gift.
Sir, considering all these things I have been taught, how can I go and watch a sitcom where sex is treated like a cheap rag, something to be thrown around to satisfy desires, simply a way to get what you want. It astonishes me how sex is now as cheap as a penny, almost worthless. How can I treat physical intimacy as a sacred thing when the whole world screams at me to use it for personal gain and self indulgence?
No. I will not stand for this. I am a child of God, with a divine destiny and a divine heritage. God has seen fit to give me the gift of life and the gift of a physical body. I am precious in his sight, and I will treat myself as such. My body is not something to be thrown around to satisfy vile pleasures. I am more than that, a precious daughter who has a right to the full blessings of heaven if I but follow God’s commandments. I respect his will and his love by promising to use his gifts correctly.
So you tell me—how can I possibly watch something so demeaning to my divine identity? Something that tells me I am worth no more than my carnal pleasures, that I am nothing more than an animal. How can I watch Television shows that constantly tell me that bodies are cheap, that my life is nothing more than a quest to satisfy my sensual desires?
I say NO. I am more than that. I am of noble birth, and I refuse to fill my head with such despicable lies. I promise to watch worthy, uplifting entertainment that reminds me who I am, that encourages me to be good, that tells me I am worth something.
No sir, I will not watch such things.
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