It is my firm belief that as soon as you feel like your life is getting comfortable, or that you’re finally getting used to the hundreds of responsibilities that you have, God will shake it up every time. If we are truly following his commandments, he will not leave us in our comfort zones like stagnant water to be scummed over with slime. Nope. As soon as you think your life might be okay for a little while, God slaps you with something else to keep you on your toes. Or maybe it’s because after you’ve proved you can handle what you’ve been given, God decides that you are ready for more. So, cool that God trusts you so much, but annoying that your life gets even more crazy. I love that quote from Mother Theresa: “I know that God will never give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”
Case in point—The past two weeks have been me worrying to death about finishing my Shakespeare paper (which I get to present at BYU in three weeks—YAHOO!), searching and applying for scholarships while getting ready to receive my endowments in the temple. I had to go back to the distribution center TWICE for the right sizes.
I finally finished the major revisions of my Shakespeare paper and hoped that I could breathe easy for a week. But no. I’m teaching a lesson in Relief Society the day after leading the music for my cousin’s baptism. Then Brother Jackson pulls me aside and says I should give a sacrament meeting talk because I’ve just been to the temple. So. This week—baptism and relief society lesson. Next week—sacrament meeting talk. The week after that—present my Shakespeare paper at BYU and attend the three day symposium (so excited!).
Sheesh. God will NOT let me sit still. But, having a busy life is a blessing. No chances to be bored, and all the things I’m doing are shaping my life into what I want it to be. It’s all for my own good. Who wouldn’t want more goodness in their lives? I’m so excited for my presentation. I feel more and more like a real writer these days. My dreams are coming true!
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Day by Day--Handling Stress
The BEST part of the past two weeks was me figuring out that I can’t stay at school til 5:00 anymore. My neighbor is always concerned about my stress levels (I cried on Christmas Day—how lame is that?) and told me to look up Dr. Lam’s article on Adrenal Fatigue. I’m not going to follow Dr. Lam’s strict program for Adrenal Recovery, but reading his article made me realize that I wasn’t giving myself enough time to rejuvenate each day. By going to bed late, I robbed my body of the time usually spent rejuvenating the adrenal glands. The adrenal glands are what the body uses to handle stress. I knew I couldn’t just eliminate all the activities in my life. Instead, I had to ensure that my body was able to handle the stress of teaching school from day to day. By going to bed at eleven, my body didn’t have enough rest to recover and be replenished for the next day. So the next morning, I’d already be running on borrowed energy. That night, I’d go to bed late again, trying to keep up with writing, recreation, and family duties, thus depleting my energy reserves even further, day after day, until my body literally couldn’t handle the stress any more.
This week, I’ve committed to go to bed by 10:30 every night so that my body gets enough sleep to replenish the energy I need for the next day. In addition, I’ve committed to leave school by 4:00 every afternoon to make sure that my brain has enough time to recover from school, emails, and angry parents before I have to attend institute, FHE, or karate practice. School is great, but I need time to unwind and regroup before I’m ready to socialize at institute.
Basically, I’ve committed to give my body the sleep and time it needs to replenish itself every day instead of waiting for Summer vacation to feel happy again. If I don’t clean off my desk, I can do it the next morning when I’m feeling refreshed and energetic. I’ll have more energy and thus, I’ll be more efficient and get more done. It’s worked! I’m loving it so far. It’s okay for me to have a terrible, stressful day at school. I just need to have time to rest and recover. Leaving school at 4:00 is now a NECESSITY, not a luxury.
I never knew that bedtime, day after day, was so important! My neighbor was very concerned, knowing that I needed to figure out how to handle all the stress in my life before diving into an accelerated, one year film school program. How would I survive? The Advanced Immersion program goes for 11 months straight. NO summer vacation. I can’t wait for the weekend anymore to feel “okay” again. I don’t want to wait for summer vacation or Christmas break or the next term to feel happy. I want to be happy every day, every hour. I have a RIGHT to be happy every day and wake up in the morning with a cheerful heart. Although I can’t escape the stress of everyday life, if I give myself time to rest every day, than it won’t matter anymore. My problem wasn’t the fact that I had to do Mom’s tax abatement and write and handle lesson planning, along with writing projects and singles ward activities, the problem was that I was running myself to the ground, never stopping, night after night. If I rest as I go, I’ll have enough energy to handle it all. If I rest, I can greet the next day with a cheerful heart and be prepared for whatever the next day might bring. Wow.
My life has grown. More activities, more responsibilities, more requirements. I way I handle all those things has to change, too. Day by day, work and rest, sorrow and joy—that’s the secret. Just like Elder Anderson said in his CES fireside talk. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. That’s the secret.
This week, I’ve committed to go to bed by 10:30 every night so that my body gets enough sleep to replenish the energy I need for the next day. In addition, I’ve committed to leave school by 4:00 every afternoon to make sure that my brain has enough time to recover from school, emails, and angry parents before I have to attend institute, FHE, or karate practice. School is great, but I need time to unwind and regroup before I’m ready to socialize at institute.
Basically, I’ve committed to give my body the sleep and time it needs to replenish itself every day instead of waiting for Summer vacation to feel happy again. If I don’t clean off my desk, I can do it the next morning when I’m feeling refreshed and energetic. I’ll have more energy and thus, I’ll be more efficient and get more done. It’s worked! I’m loving it so far. It’s okay for me to have a terrible, stressful day at school. I just need to have time to rest and recover. Leaving school at 4:00 is now a NECESSITY, not a luxury.
I never knew that bedtime, day after day, was so important! My neighbor was very concerned, knowing that I needed to figure out how to handle all the stress in my life before diving into an accelerated, one year film school program. How would I survive? The Advanced Immersion program goes for 11 months straight. NO summer vacation. I can’t wait for the weekend anymore to feel “okay” again. I don’t want to wait for summer vacation or Christmas break or the next term to feel happy. I want to be happy every day, every hour. I have a RIGHT to be happy every day and wake up in the morning with a cheerful heart. Although I can’t escape the stress of everyday life, if I give myself time to rest every day, than it won’t matter anymore. My problem wasn’t the fact that I had to do Mom’s tax abatement and write and handle lesson planning, along with writing projects and singles ward activities, the problem was that I was running myself to the ground, never stopping, night after night. If I rest as I go, I’ll have enough energy to handle it all. If I rest, I can greet the next day with a cheerful heart and be prepared for whatever the next day might bring. Wow.
My life has grown. More activities, more responsibilities, more requirements. I way I handle all those things has to change, too. Day by day, work and rest, sorrow and joy—that’s the secret. Just like Elder Anderson said in his CES fireside talk. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. That’s the secret.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Kid Stuff
Okay, I’m writing this post now because I’ve got writer’s block with my novel. So here goes: A few months ago my grandpa gave me a bag full of papers. The papers that Grandma had kept for years-- report cards, pictures I drew at school, mother’s day poems . . . etc. I sat at the kitchen table with my sister Lori and started looking through them. I picked up the autobiography that I wrote in fifth grade.
I’ve forgotten how long the biography was supposed to be, or how many pages the other students wrote—but I had NINE. NINE pages full of details about my ten year old life.
I started reading it out loud to my sister, Lori. I couldn’t believe how good it was! After teaching seventh graders for two years, I’ve found that only a few students write consistently in complete sentences. Only a few connect their sentences in a way that helps them flow together. Only a few actually have a sense for what writing should sound like. And here I was, reading a fifth grade autobiography that would have sounded beautiful coming from a seventh grader! I was shocked. I wrote in complete sentences. I even used all of my apostrophes correctly. Every sentence had a period. Every word was spelled correctly. I even used specific details and started my sentences in different ways. Holy COW, I was a wonderful writer as early as fifth grade! I had no clue that I was that good. No wonder my ninth grade English teacher yelled at me for not signing up for the honors English class. Wow.
I thought writing was something I had developed more as a teenager and in college. But this old elementary assignment showed me that writing was a talent I’d had forever. It’s something that has always been with me.
I wonder if my writing talent was something I had in the preexistence. How much of my personality comes from my spiritual identity? I don’t think these kinds of things pop out of nowhere.
I’ve forgotten how long the biography was supposed to be, or how many pages the other students wrote—but I had NINE. NINE pages full of details about my ten year old life.
I started reading it out loud to my sister, Lori. I couldn’t believe how good it was! After teaching seventh graders for two years, I’ve found that only a few students write consistently in complete sentences. Only a few connect their sentences in a way that helps them flow together. Only a few actually have a sense for what writing should sound like. And here I was, reading a fifth grade autobiography that would have sounded beautiful coming from a seventh grader! I was shocked. I wrote in complete sentences. I even used all of my apostrophes correctly. Every sentence had a period. Every word was spelled correctly. I even used specific details and started my sentences in different ways. Holy COW, I was a wonderful writer as early as fifth grade! I had no clue that I was that good. No wonder my ninth grade English teacher yelled at me for not signing up for the honors English class. Wow.
I thought writing was something I had developed more as a teenager and in college. But this old elementary assignment showed me that writing was a talent I’d had forever. It’s something that has always been with me.
I wonder if my writing talent was something I had in the preexistence. How much of my personality comes from my spiritual identity? I don’t think these kinds of things pop out of nowhere.
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